In the movie Invictus, national rugby team captain Francois Pienaar faces a challenge shared by most South Africans: He’s asked to change his beliefs and his ways. Newly elected president Nelson Mandela has set bold objectives for racial reconciliation after years of apartheid. The movie beautifully depicts the true story of how Mandela influenced Pienaar
In his book “A Hidden Wholeness: The Journey Toward an Undivided Life,” Parker Palmer observes that human beings — especially in group settings — often behave like animals in the wild that remain in hiding and only allow themselves to be seen when it’s safe and worthwhile to take the risk. The only difference in
In 1985, Charles Hummel wrote a pamphlet suggesting that most people’s lives are ruled by things that are urgent. He added that most people don’t do enough of the things that have delayed gratification because there “isn’t time” or they “couldn’t get to it.” Like for the past three weeks I’ve been trying to do
In my last post I considered how predictable emotional regulation contributes to trust and influence, especially under stress. Here we’ll look at how effective interpersonal interpretation, especially under stress, further contributes to trust and influence. Let’s face it, even the smartest humans aren’t capable of processing all the data around them at any given time.
Here’s an obvious truth worth contemplating: Many times a day, you and I experience emotions while we’re interacting with others. We feel frustrated, annoyed, anxious, angry, nervous, excited, jealous, resentful, disappointed… The way we act and communicate amidst our emotional states will impact our trust, influence and wellbeing. It Can Be HARD to Regulate Emotions
Early in my career, I reported up to a very impatient listener. Occasionally, he would ask me to meet with him, which was always a dreaded request — not because he was mean; he just had the shortest attention span I’d ever experienced. With my background as a software engineer, I went into those meetings
I recently joined one of my clients for a Zoom meeting with participants from three departments in their organization. As discussion of the topic got underway, it quickly became apparent to me from my vantage point as an outsider that one department had the power, one felt marginalized, and one didn’t really care. In fact,
I think you’re being overly sensitive. You took it the wrong way! Well, I only said that because… I’ve already apologized. What else do you want from me? Why do you have to be so critical? That’s not really what I meant. Ok, maybe I shouldn’t have said that, but… That IS what I said!
Last night, I turned over my phone and sat on the floor next to my bed to stretch and read. The night before, I did the same thing. Same the night before that. It has become my most important daily discipline because I’ve realized something fascinating: This habit impacts the following 24 hours in a
In any leadership role, whether you’re running a family, a team, or an organization — or even in running your own life — there are three inevitables you’ll encounter: Difficult people Stressful events Hard choices As you face each of these, you have a choice: You can either respond or you can react. Responding is
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE