Managing Your Calendar and the Stress It Creates
Too often, these thought patterns have dominated the way I think about my calendar:
- Over-estimating my capacity: I’m available, so I suppose will!
- Fearing let down or rejection: I’d hate to disappoint that person…
- Feeling overwhelmed: I have no idea how I will get all this done.
Does any of this resonate with you?
These patterns have, at times, left me feeling overscheduled and frustrated with my progress.
To minimize these destructive and debilitating patterns, I’ve studied what time management experts and successful leaders do. Here are two strategies I’ve learned from them:
- Cultivate your calendar like a garden. For several seasons, we’ve lived with some low-level frustration about parts of the landscaping at our home. This year, we set out to fix that! New grass seed, new plantings, better weed control. The frustration has been relieved and now I’m in the mindset to make ongoing adjustments.
Calendars require similar maintenance: regular pruning, planting, and pulling. I’ve come to realize that the people with the most impact and least stress view their calendar as a work of art, as a true reflection of their priorities, not a cluster of obligations and inefficiencies. Questions you can ask yourself regularly as you study your calendar are:
- Is my heart really in this?
- Do I have the most important things scheduled?
- Will the version of myself in 5 years appreciate what’s on my calendar this month?
- Am I doing anything just because I struggle to let go or say no?
- Is there anything that’s an inefficient use of resources?
- Just focus on now and next. My son is a competitive tennis player and spends a lot of time thinking about the mental side of his game. Listening to psychologists and great players, he’s come to realize that the most important point is the point you’re playing. Then, when it’s over, the most important point is the next point. I realize that sounds so simple, but it’s not. Most players dwell on the last point or think ahead to the outcome of the match, causing a lack of focus and an increase in stress.
Similarly, when I look ahead to a week full of difficult, high-stakes demands on my time, I’m tempted to dwell on my past performance (including what others thought of me) and deliberate on how in the world I’ll be able to get everything done with the results I desire. Instead, I need to remember to be present in the moment and then simply do the next thing. This never fails! Here are the questions to regularly ask ourselves:
- What matters most right now?
- What planning or preparation do I need to do?
- What did I learn so that I can move forward?
As we move past the midpoint of the calendar year, perhaps these strategies will help you move past inefficient and unproductive thought patterns about your calendar so that you can approach life with less stress and more impact.
What do you now realize about the way you think about your calendar?
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