Practicing the Art of Slowing
I have two selves: one wants to drive under the speed limit, the other groans and tails people who drive slowly; one wants to spend the last hour of the day with a hot bath and a good book, the other wants to answer emails until my eyes hurt. Paradoxically, I think I would be a more effective and sustainable leader if I lived more slowly.
Last week, Kari asked me to buy limes on my way home from work. I drove aggressively to the store, got the closest parking spot, walked briskly to the limes, put them on the tray in the express line behind the person in front of me and… two seconds later I looked up but it was too late. The open lane next to ours had been filled. The young woman running that register smirked at me as if to say, “You lost buddy.” I’d put my cashier Gordy in his late eighties and he was the embodiment of slow. Each coin was pulled from the tray with excruciating calm and focus. Next I noticed the cigarettes in Gordy’s breast pocket. I wondered, “How does this guy live and work an active job into his eighty’s as a smoker? I eat well and maintain a decent exercise routine… and yet, Gordy seems healthier than me.” When I declined a bag for my three limes, he looked at me, with a smile out of the corner of his mouth and said slowly, “Well, don’t drop them in the parking lot.” He winked at me knowingly. It was as if he knew something that I did not – that the secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.
I wonder about the implications of intentionally slowing… before I’m forced to. Perhaps ways we could do this would be to:
1. Slow Your Body. Last Saturday I woke up 15 minutes before the kids to do some yoga in my basement. Just this short amount of time to intentionally stretch, think, pray and breathe, dialed back my engines in a way that made me feel alive. Endurance athletes know that a key to performance is stretching, calming and setting a sustainable pace. Let’s eat slower, drive slower and breathe.
2. Disconnect. In 2010, the NY Times did an excellent series called Your Brain on Computers where they explored the physiological effects of being wired. The research revealed, for example, that using mobile technology at every possible moment (a red light, a waiting room, before falling asleep) is eliminating free associative and creative thinking that occurs spontaneously throughout the day, which is actually evolving the permanent chemistry of our brain. To preserve our ability to ideate and innovate, we need to intentionally unplug.
3. Hang with old people. One of my close friends for the past ten years, Peter, is forty years older than me. We share interests in rowing, faith and the outdoors. He moved out of town a couple of years ago and, among other things, I miss his pace. He has bad ankles which makes it hard to get up stairs or walk with any speed. And he talks with the pace that he walks. With his deliberate speech and a hearing aid, talking with him makes me slowdown, which makes me smile and communicate more thoughtfully.
4. Consider the benefits. I keep forgetting that hurry doesn’t lead to productivity. In his book Margin: How to Create the Emotional, Physical, Financial and Time Reserves You Need, Dr. Richard Swenson, a medical doctor, explores the health and performance benefits of living with margin – space between ourselves and our limits. Leading with margin allows us to be spontaneous, to think deeply and to endure.
I’m going on vacation this week and not checking email. What are you going to do to slow?
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