It was the most upset I’ve ever been at work. Years ago, a part of my job was to negotiate contracts with vendors. One negotiation reached an impasse. The vendor raised his voice slightly and accused me of personally derailing the process. My reaction was intense. I shouted something back at him in my defense,
Have you ever felt inadequate to respond when someone has opened up to you about their feelings? I know I have. But after I get past the awkwardness, I always find the profound connection makes the discomfort worth it. I had been working with Elizabeth (not her real name) for about six months. She joined
Have you ever written an email while feeling angry or upset? Have you ever read an email that made you feel angry or upset? Last week my wife and I got an email from a company that we hired to help us with work at our house. The work we agreed to cost $1,000. Their
My favorite partner at Accenture (my brother-in-law) likes to say that “delivery trumps all else.” He’s right, but “delivery” is only your ticket to play. People who do good work and also sell their work have far greater control over their success than those who just do the work. In other words, the winner will
Is showing emotion at work verboten? I’m starting to re-consider the popular assumption that it is. Crying, laughing, protesting and celebrating are authentic displays of who we are and central to our humanness. The more human we are, the more we can fully engage with others. And as social acumen becomes increasingly critical to workplace
I have two colleagues, both of whom I’ve known for about the same amount of time. With one, I’m somewhat guarded, not willing to be completely transparent. But with the other, I’m surprised at how vulnerable and candid I can be. The question is, why the difference? I know them equally well. Neither has any
A consultant was meeting with an executive recently when the executive opened up about his stress and anxiety. The consultant was in a dilemma. He had an agenda and goals for the meeting, but this executive clearly had a need to be heard. Maybe you’ve been in a similar situation—on either side of that conversation.
“Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.” –Karl A. Menniger I was sitting across the lunch table from a client as he let me inside his most
Recently, I coached an accomplished CEO as he was preparing to deliver a university commencement speech. He had fascinating stories to share that revealed profound truths about life, work and meaning. He spoke with confidence and warmth. And yet somehow still, listening to him, I felt bored and detached. I stopped him and asked what
Last week I reviewed a proposal with a potential client. It had several elements, which would take me at least five minutes to explain, and like a proud author wanting the reader to reserve judgment until they’ve read the entire book, I wanted to cover it all before getting a reaction. But a voice whispered
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE