Recently I went running with some friends. It started out rough, though, because my stomach hurt and I felt lightheaded. “Oh no!” I thought. “I’m not going to be able to keep pace with them, and this is going to be awful.” My muscles tightened, I started to worry, and I did slow down. Then
There’s a beautiful and instructive scene in the movie Inside Out when Bing Bong doesn’t want to keep going because he’s so upset about the changes happening around him. The character representing Joy becomes frustrated and tries to coax Bing Bong to move on. “It’s going to be OK, we can fix this,” she cheers.
Harvard psychologist Robert Kegan suggests that most people never become high-functioning adults who think for themselves. Becoming a fully functioning adult, according to Kegan, requires transformation away from dependent thinking. He theorizes that people need to transform through five stages (including what drives choices): Stage 1 – Impulsive Mind (immediate gratification) Stage 2 – Imperial
Researchers conducting a study asked humans and monkeys to perform a series of random tasks. To limit their ability to talk to themselves, some of the humans were asked to repeat the words “blah, blah, blah” while performing the tasks. The humans who performed the tasks without repeating “blah, blah, blah” demonstrated all the working
My friend Jamie leads a large technology organization. Last week I joined him for an all-hands Q&A about my latest book, Lead with Influence. Jamie previously read and reviewed the book, so he asked really thoughtful questions that apply especially to knowledge workers. Because so many readers of my posts are in knowledge work and,
Last week a client who leads HR for her company said to me, “I did a hundred things today. Why didn’t anything happen?! I got insurance cards out, reset logins, answered emails, sat through meetings…but I don’t think I drove any meaningful progress.” Ah, the tyranny of the urgent, the whirlwind of demands. It’s a
I work closely with a company that designs and manufactures expensive boats. One of their long-time customers, a large boat dealer, asked for a meeting with them to discuss boat design improvements they believe are needed to sell more boats. The dealer has a long pattern of harsh criticism and negativity. At the same time,
An executive I once reported to made something very clear: His job was to focus one to five years out, my job was to focus three to 12 months ahead, and the people reporting to me were to focus on the current quarter. I remember being somewhat relieved by this limited responsibility, thinking, “I can’t
Our family took a “twilight nature hike” on a trip last year. What could have lasted 15 minutes lasted two hours due to the pace of the guide. “Please stay behind me,” he calmly repeated as we slowly proceeded through the complete darkness. Over and over again, he’d thoughtfully respond to a question or quietly
I took time over the holidays to rest, get organized for the new year, and connect in meaningful ways with family. Having that time, though, opened up space for some unwanted thoughts too. Do you ever allow all your thoughts to flow, even the unwanted ones? Your insecurities, fears, selfish desires, resentments, and uncertainties? The
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE