An executive I once reported to made something very clear: His job was to focus one to five years out, my job was to focus three to 12 months ahead, and the people reporting to me were to focus on the current quarter. I remember being somewhat relieved by this limited responsibility, thinking, “I can’t
A colleague recently made an important decision that affected me without asking for my input. It wasn’t the first time this happened and probably won’t be the last. It seems to be a pattern, to make decisions without involving others when the decisions impact others in meaningful ways. The question I’m wrestling with is: Should
My last article presented 10 forms of personal reactivity that everyone should carefully manage. Whether it’s anger, anxiety, worry, blame, insecurity or lack of boundaries, emotional triggers disrupt relationship health. While those reactions might be our default responses, awareness helps us interrupt the patterns and make different choices about how we behave, especially in challenging
Recently, I came on too strong with someone. My voice was a bit loud and aggressive. My words were harsh. I was right to be upset, but my reaction only escalated the situation, and the relationship was strained as a result. In the end, I’m not sure anything productive was accomplished. Perhaps I drove my
I didn’t use ChatGPT to write this article, unlike my last one. However, I’ve been thinking about ChatGPT “prompt engineers” who make close to $350,000 without any previous professional experience. Essentially, a prompt engineer asks ChatGPT really good questions in order to get really good responses. Call them AI Whisperers. It makes me wonder, do
Today I walked my dog around our neighborhood through freezing rain, dirty snow and slushy puddles. Of course, my neighborhood has seen many more pleasant days and many more will come. Knowing that only made me want to escape to one of those days, either past or future. However, I resisted the pull because I’ve
Anxiety is perhaps the most natural response to tension and change. I witness it when I encourage my kids to practice their instrument, or try to get someone to spend time on my project, or ask people to give money to a cause. They almost always react with some level of resistance and anxiety. Leadership
In the movie Invictus, national rugby team captain Francois Pienaar faces a challenge shared by most South Africans: He’s asked to change his beliefs and his ways. Newly elected president Nelson Mandela has set bold objectives for racial reconciliation after years of apartheid. The movie beautifully depicts the true story of how Mandela influenced Pienaar
In my last post I considered how predictable emotional regulation contributes to trust and influence, especially under stress. Here we’ll look at how effective interpersonal interpretation, especially under stress, further contributes to trust and influence. Let’s face it, even the smartest humans aren’t capable of processing all the data around them at any given time.
Here’s an obvious truth worth contemplating: Many times a day, you and I experience emotions while we’re interacting with others. We feel frustrated, annoyed, anxious, angry, nervous, excited, jealous, resentful, disappointed… The way we act and communicate amidst our emotional states will impact our trust, influence and wellbeing. It Can Be HARD to Regulate Emotions
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE