Disappointment: the difference between what we expect and what we get. Events, circumstances and people disappoint us and we disappoint ourselves. To move from disappointment to contentment, we have to process our emotions and surrender our expectations. This Mother’s Day, my wife Kari was supposed to be entering her third trimester. We miscarried that baby
The Greek word for “anxiety” is merimnaō, which means to be divided or distracted. Leaders today face so many external and internal disruptions that anxiety, by the Greek definition, is nearly unavoidable. Anxiety depletes energy and confidence and makes courageous decisions difficult. One way to minimize anxiety is to pursue the opposite of division and
Joy is an uncomplicated word. It’s the feeling of goodness that comes from being fully alive. And it can be present regardless of circumstances – pain or pleasure. Wouldn’t it be cool to create joy all over the place – at home, at work, in the community and in ourselves? One way is through lasting
I want to be comfortable. I like my daily routine and sleeping in my own bed. I want to be around people like me and do things I’m good at doing. But the truth is, I know that comfort is at odds with being fully alive. Last week, we took the kids to Disney World.
I have two selves: one wants to drive under the speed limit, the other groans and tails people who drive slowly; one wants to spend the last hour of the day with a hot bath and a good book, the other wants to answer emails until my eyes hurt. Paradoxically, I think I would be
People often want more responsibility and a bigger title. Whether it’s at a full-time job or on a volunteer board, leaders are wired to pursue greater influence. Increasing responsibility and influence is a way for us to be more valuable. One challenge with positioning ourselves for more responsibility is being promotable without being self-promotional. And
The only people that don’t admit to fighting insecurity at times are insecure about being honest. While insecurity is a part of being human, it can limit our clarity, creativity and communication. Dale Carnegie Training conducted research last year, and will follow with further research to be released next month, revealing that the feeling of
We get in our own way. Impulse, laziness, fear and mindlessness often lead us away from what makes us most alive. Structure can save us. Whether it’s a cadence, routine, discipline or policy, we need to build structure into our lives and organizations to protect us from ourselves. At times in my life, I’ve felt
Structure is essential to inspiring creativity and self-expression. Neuroscientists have recently demonstrated that improvisation occurs when the self-monitoring region of our brain turns off through mastery of a foundational structure. Musician Yo-Yo Ma said, “An innovation, to grow organically from within, has to be based on an intact tradition.” I wish I could fully enjoy
We hold tight to people, pleasures and positions that make us feel more alive. Whether it’s our loyalty to children, health, or performance, these objects of our love are often very good things that benefit from our attention. They also give us status, meaning and happiness. So our grip on them is fierce, sometimes to
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE